Shutter [Unrated]

Ever since the 1998 Japanese film "Ringu" received an Americanized big-budget remake, Hollywood studios have been having a ball bringing over Eastern horror films. It has been a near epidemic at times and the latest film to come to American shores is the Americanized version of the 2004 Thai film "Shutter." As is typical with these films, the Western version lacks the story and tension of the original and these watered-down horror pictures are only slicker looking with better production values. I had some high hopes for "Shutter" after hearing of how well the original film did and hoped that this remake would be at least half as good. It is not and this is one of the worst of the batch of Western derived versions of Eastern horror blockbusters.

In "Shutter," "Dawson´s Creek´s" Joshua Jackson stars as Benjamin Shaw. Shaw is a talented young photographer and marries Jane Shaw (Rachael Taylor) in a very nice wedding ceremony that follows with a very nice honeymoon in Japan, where Ben has taken a job as a fashion photographer with a few friends. Ben takes a few photographs of him and his new bride during the honeymoon, but they become distraught when a flaw appears on a large number of prints. Later, when Ben undertakes his first high-profile shoot, the flaws again return and Ben is put in a position where his company loses a lot of money and he nearly loses his job upon the return of these flaws that are blamed on the camera. However, his friends Bruno (David Denman) and Adam (John Hensley) are not about to can their good friend.

Jane´s early times in Japan find her being isolated and shaken after she believes that she and Ben had hit a young woman while traveling from their honeymoon to Tokyo. She fully believes they have murdered the young girl and soon begins to believe the flaws in the photographs are images of the young girl. Soon, Jane and Ben begin to see physical manifestations of the dead girl and the concept of spiritual photography is introduced to the film. At this point in the story, a cameo by "Heroes´" James Kyson Lee is introduced as an expert on spiritual photography and it becomes established that Ben and Jane are being haunted by the young girl and that perhaps her body is still in the physical realm and her spirit needs released. The plot thickens when the girl´s identity is revealed to be a translator named Megumi Tanaka (Megumi Okina); somebody that Ben had known during a previous visit to Japan.

"Shutter" loosely holds to the storyline of the original film, but injects a "Lost in Translation" storyline where poor Jane is caught in a foreign land. The general themes behind the story are solid, but the feel and haunting nature of "Shutter" is apparently lost in translation as the Americanized version of the film is nowhere near as entertaining or haunting as the film that critics poured praise upon. With Japanese horror director Masayuki Ochaia behind the helm of the picture, the hope of Eastern spiritual beliefs and sensibilities should have made their way to celluloid, but even a Japanese director cannot escape the American screenplay by Luke Dawson. This English language debut by Ochiai hardly seems indicative of a film shot in Japan by a Japanese director and comes off just another American remake that is more caring about style than substance.

While I found the notion of spiritual photography to be interesting, I could not find much enjoyment out of "Shutter." Part of the reason was that the story and the filmmakers seemed to completely miss the boat on providing true frights and the Eastern beliefs in spirits. Some poor jump frights and flash-heavy photography is used to scare the audience and it has become old hat after "The Ring" and "The Grudge" and other films to remake their way to American soil. The scene I despised the most involved Megumi appearing during the first photo shoot and talking to Ben. I learned this was injected for the Unrated version of the film and this was a great example of a scene that did not help the film out at all by jumping off the cutting room floor. The bottom line is that "Shutter" is neither scary nor spooky and if you´ve seen any of the two films the producers of "Shutter" were previously behind, and then you´ve seen all of the tricks in this film as well. Only the final reveal of why Ben´s shoulders were sore was of interest.

Cast is another problem with "Shutter." I loved seeing the lovely Australian actress Rachael Taylor in a role outside of "Transformers," where she was the most stunning computer nerd you´d ever meet, but having an Australian playing an American stuck in Tokyo is a stretch and there were times when Rachael´s accent snuck through just a little bit. While Rachael is a gorgeous young woman, I feel she was miscast. Joshua Jackson has not done too much memorable beyond "Dawson´s Creek" and "The Mighty Ducks" and he seems like another budget American actor casted because he has a nice smile. This is definitely not a movie where the film benefits from the film.

I like the idea of bringing foreign films to American soil. It´s a wonderful concept. However, I´d much rather prefer to see some subtitles thrown onto the original picture and see the original work of art shown in theater houses. "The Ring" was a unique idea at first, but this continued onslaught of Eastern horror films becoming Western duds is disconcerting and "Shutter" is a prime reason of why these pictures are not succeeding in the American market. They stink. Plain and simple. The original picture earned a 79% on RottenTomatoes.com. The remake chalked up a pathetic 7% on the same website, so I know I´m not alone in my belief that well enough should have been left alone. Now, please release the original so we can enjoy how the story is meant to be told.

--> Read More ...

Phineas and Ferb [TV Show] [The Fast and the Phineas]

Like "Pinky and the Brain," each episode of "Phineas and Ferb" begins the same way, with the two main characters wondering what to do. But rather than trying to take over the world in every episode, as those lab mice did time and again, the boys use their imaginations to expand their world in order to make their 104-day summer vacation more fun.

This hybrid animated Disney Channel show from creators Dan Povenmire ("The Family Guy") and Jeff "Swampy" Marsh draws inspiration from a number of different shows. In addition to a little Pinky madness, it also has the zaniness and fluid leaps in logic of "The Fairly Oddparents," and a conceptual structure that's reminiscent of another popular Disney Channel show, "Kim Possible." Like that series, "Phineas and Ferb" offers a mixture of spy stuff and teen angst, with another random animal tossed into the mix. Instead of a naked mole rat, it's a platypus. And in this show, it's the pet who's the secret agent. Sounds weird? It is, but it's also a smartly written series that has more inventiveness and energy than most of the cartoon shows that are being produced these days. It celebrates the power of the imagination and revels in every one of those gigantic leaps in logic that defy gravity and provide the infrastructure for every outing. What's more, Povenmire and Marsh seem to like working without a net.

Phineas Flynn (Vincent Martella) and Ferb Fletcher (Thomas Sangster) live with their parents--the seldom-seen Linda Flynn (Caroline Rhea) and even more conspicuously absent Lawrence Fletcher (Richard O'Brien)--somewhere in the "Tri-State area." The boys get along great and are regular magicians when it comes to the visualization and construction of large-scale projects to make their summer days fun. Nothing is too big or too complicated for them, because if they can imagine it, they can build or do it. In some of these episodes, for example, they erect a haunted house to cure the hiccups of their friend Isabella (Alyson Stoner), they construct a complete beach just outside their fenced-in backyard, and they become one-hit wonders just to get a taste of the music business. Much more, and it would seem like work, not play, and these guys like getting away with things. But what goes around comes around, because just as they're pulling a fast one on their parents, these stepbrothers have no idea that the family pet is a secret agent who discretely saves the world every episode.

Like so many cartoon shows, there's a single nemesis, and for secret agent Perry the Platypus (call him "Agent P") it's a baddie who's a little reminiscent of Gargamel from the old "Smurfs" show. The evil Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz (voiced by Povenmire) turned out to be the mad scientist that he is because, as we learn in one episode, he was forced by his German father to stand for hours and days at a time in their garden to replace the family's stolen garden gnome. Such is the deliciously twisted humor of Povenmire and Marsh. Agent P goes after Doofenshmirtz in what almost feels like a parallel (but somehow intersecting) universe, then goes back to his regular life as the family pet. "There you are, Perry," Phineas often says after Agent P has once again quietly triumphed. Given the boys' own outlandish adventures, it's a double dose of imagination pushed to the brink.

The animation is a mixture of geometric shapes (Phineas's head is a simple triangle), a style that again falls somewhere between harsh angularity of "The Fairly Oddparents" and the softer world of "Kim Possible." It's a pleasing-to-watch style that's totally compatible with the wild inventions, wise-guy writing, and breakneck pacing. But what makes every episode really click is a running gag that will remind older viewers of the "Bewitched" TV series, where a neighbor who knew darned well that Samantha was making strange things happen next door kept trying to get her husband to look. But every time he would, things would have returned back to normal. The same thing happens here, with Phineas's older natural sibling Candace (Ashley Tisdale, "High School Musical") obsessed with trying to get her mother to see the kinds of stunts that her brothers are pulling on a daily basis. And the gag is even funnier transplanted to a situation involving an older sister and troublemaking younger brothers--something that so many kids across America can identify with.

As a matter of fact, this is one show that older siblings will enjoy watching with younger ones, and even parents, who may be reminded of the old "Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle" shows because of the irreverent, self-conscious style. The show has the same kind of energy too, and offbeat sensibility that stops short of the manic, up-the-pace nonsense that often drives the Cartoon Network shows. "Phineas and Ferb" is great fun, and easily one of the best animated shows out there now. Here are the episodes included on this DVD:

"One Good Scare Ought to Do It!" Pts. 1&2

In this episode that hasn't been seen yet, the boys go to great lengths to build a scary haunted house/theme park with roller coaster, all to get rid of Isabella's hiccups.

"The Fast and the Phineas"/"Lawn Gnome Beach Party of Terror"
The boys "trick out" Mom's car so they can enter the big race at the track that mysteriously popped up outside their fence. Kids can't drive? No problem. They devise a remote control so one boy can manipulate the car while the other "drives" it. Then, overheated, they decide that they'd like to spend a day at the beach. And what begins with a pile of sand and a bucket of water in their backyard soon knocks down that back fence again and spills over into the entire world. They build a real beach, big enough to where Candace ends up winning a limbo contest and being lauded as queen of the beach.

"Are You My Mummy?"/"FlopStarz"
Inspired by a movie, the boys try to get a mummy, but it's Candace who ends up being wrapped in toilet paper, while Doofenshmirtz's latest scheme to flood the city by destroying a beaver dam, all to make his own property "beachfront." In "FlopStarz," Doofenshmirtz creates a giant robot out of a building that terrorizes Danville, while the boys decide they want to be one-hit wonders and Candace once again gets her moment in the spotlight.

"Raging Bully"/"Lights, Candace, Action!"
One-two-three-four, let's have a thumb war. Phineas enters a competition, while Doofenshmirtz invents a gadget that will control people's minds . . . all so that they'll be forced to attend his birthday party and clean up the mess after it's all over. In "Lights, Candace, Action!," Candace is delighted to star in "The Princess Sensibilities" until the new directors (Phineas and Ferb) decide to go a different direction, like "The Curse of the Princess Monster." Doofenshmirtz creates an Age Acceleratorinator, first to more quickly make cheese, but then to try to age Agent P.

"It's about Time!" Pts. 1&2
The stepbrothers discover an old time machine and travel back to the Jurassic Age to bring back a T-Rex. Meanwhile, these are tough times for poor Perry. It turns out that Dr. Doofenshmirtz no longer thinks of him as his nemesis. That honor is now reserved for a hero named Peter the Panda.

There's a little postmodernist play in the show, with the villain narrating exactly what he's going to do at one point but pausing when he hears no dramatic music . . . then, after the musical cue kicks in, he says, "Ahem," and continues. It's that kind of material stretches the fabric of this show to fit all sizes.

Video:
The picture looks super-sharp for a DVD, with gorgeous colors and a nice level of detail for standard definition. Disney's M.O. has been to release a handful of episodes per DVD, rather than come out with full seasons of its TV shows. If they're ever tempted to make an exception, this would be a good title to start with, because of the wide appeal that it holds. More adults would be likely to watch this show than most of the Disney Channel offerings. The aspect ratio is 1.33:1.

Audio:
The audio is a Dolby Digital Surround that involves the rear channels as well, probably a 5.1 mix. The booming and dynamic sound adds to the sense of energy, and as with the video it's a far better treatment than we're used to seeing at this level.

Extras:
As if they know they've got something that appeals to adults as well as kids, the Disney folks split the bonus features right down the middle, with something for each. Adults will enjoy the original pitch by Dan Povenmire that was used to sell Disney on the idea of the series, with Povenmire doing all the voices and narration. They liked the show enough to give him a contract, and they like his Doofenshmirtz voice enough to allow him to casst himself. Not a bad deal. This is a 22-minute feature that will seem invaluable to young would-be filmmakers wanting to know how it all begins.

For the kids, there's Phineas & Ferb's Homemade Tree Shade Arcade, a game section that includes four different activities. The games aren't super fabulous, but they should amuse the kids at least for an afternoon. There's a Whack-a-Gnome game that's a good tension reliever, a driving game where you use the left-right arrows to navigate, a matching game where you consider the situation that Perry finds himself in and click on the disguise that will enable him to blend in, and finally a pair of parental marionettes that kids use arrow keys to keep them dancing (and derive perverse pleasure from the role reversal, I'm sure). Of the four games, the disguise game is actually the most interesting.

Bottom Line:
"Phineas and Ferb" was a nice surprise. I expected a dumb or generic cartoon, but this one has personality to spare. It's full of smart writing and gags, and deviously constructed to include a little something for everyone. Even would-be evil scientists.

--> Read More ...

Don't Try This at Home Presents Steve-O: Out on Bail Volume III

How intelligence deprived Steve-O (also known as Stephen Glover) and his posse of similarly handicapped hooligans haven´t killed themselves or ended up in traction for prolonged periods of time is beyond me. I mean, if they aren´t setting their hair on fire or stapling a scrotom to a thigh, producer/director Nick Dunlap is getting drunk in an outdoor bar and trashing the place. Or they´re defecating outside a hotel room door, allowing one of their own to walk through the mess. Or Steve-O is puking up…well, the less you know, the better.

After sitting through this third volume of "crap" (hey, that´s what they call it on the back of the DVD), I can´t for the life of me figure out why anyone would voluntarily take part in these stunts, let alone revel in their depravity. I mean, there´s no point to anything in the entire 92 minutes except to see how profane, obscene, maliciously destructive, immature, sophomoric and asinine a group of grown men can be. The late, great performer Evel Knievel is Shakespeare compared to the stunts Steve-O pulls.

The problem is they aren´t funny to watch. Throwing a hotel room phone out the window, breaking a beer can on his head, getting into a fight with a supposed friend…these are sadistic actions catering to the lowest common denominator in society. I hesitate to use the term "trailer trash" because: (1) it´s offensive to people who might live in a trailer; and (2) Steve-O isn´t even good enough for Cletus and Brandeen from "The Simpsons." All I kept asking myself was why.

Why are arenas and venues packed for each show around the world? Why do women lift their shirts, exposing their breasts, for these guys (none of which are attractive)? Why in the world do parents bring their school age children to a show and then sit in utter disbelief about the antics without doing a thing? And, for god sakes, how many times do we need to see Steve-O playing with his feces?

Maybe I´m going about this all wrong. Maybe the idea isn´t to hold Steve-O to everyone else´s standard, but to create a new standard FOR him. Just how filthy and vile can the stunts get while retaining some kind of audience? Clearly, from what we have here, audiences clamor for all the raunch they can get.

I guess the above question can be distilled down to one central premise: is Steve-O any more offensive in his day than Richard Pryor was in his? Or George Carlin? That is to say, can Mr. Glover get away with the things he does because of the times in which he lives? In our modern age of video on demand and YouTube, can´t an argument be made Steve-O and "Jackass" are simple extensions of technology? As in, we´ve entered a time in our culture when things are done not because they are good ideas, but because we can?

It is, alas, one of the downfalls to having a free media and the first amendment. A citizen can be offended all they want by an action or word, but until a second person is physically harmed, nothing can be done. And "Out on Bail Volume III" makes sure no bystander is hurt in the antics. In that respect, then, Steve-O is commendable. Not to mention he´s not the one destroying other people´s property for no reason. Those ignominious acts are committed by his cohorts. Really, Steve-O doesn´t hurt other people, only himself.

Let me be clear: that doesn´t excuse him from not chastising Ryan Dunn, Dunlap and the others. As the ringleader, so to speak, he has the responsibility on his shoulders for everything happening in his name. If these dopes want to hurt themselves and throw urine on one another, feel free. No one, outside those involved, gets hurt. But when property is destroyed for no good reason without any sense of remorse, people do get hurt. And that´s the sad part. Consequences never cross anyone´s mind while engaging in tomfoolery.

---

--> Read More ...

MANswers, The Best of Season One

Forgive my stereotyping, but as I was watching "MANswers," I couldn't help picturing a group of male teens, maybe even college freshmen, gathered around Spike TV giggling like crazy; or possibly a single, middle-aged male slacker sitting on an old, overstuffed recliner in a cramped apartment, swilling beer. "MANswers" aims for the lowest possible audience mentality and hits the mark squarely. As journalist H.L. Mencken once wrote, "No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American people." It's totally mindless, witless, hapless, frivolous diversion that might, nevertheless, almost by accident hit the funny bone on occasion.

"MANswers: The Best of Season One" (2007) contains a succession of three-to-four minute segments that attempt to address some of Man's most pressing questions, like "How teeny can a bikini get before it's legally considered nudity?" or "How can you get drunk faster?" I suppose we can thank the "Jackass" TV series and movies for "MANswers." It's that kind of show, with each chapter punctuated by appropriately idiotic behavior and the expected bevy of scantily clad girls.

The disc contains a top-25 list culled from the program's first year on the air, with the chapters counting down. Here's a partial capsule report:

25: What's the best human organ to eat, the choicest cut? Like most of these segments, we get inane answers from common guys on the street and then a supposedly definitive answer from a doctor or an expert in the field. In this case, a nutritionist explains which human body part contains the most beneficial elements to eat. No, the phrase "Eat your heart out" does not apply.

24. What do the shape of a girl's boobs tell you about her personality? Clearly, the filmmakers based their answer on extensive research.

23. What's the most dangerous wild animal in America? Bears? Mountain lions? Shucks, not even close. Hint: Think Bambi.

22. How can you make your girlfriend less bitchy? This question pretty much admits that only guys are watching the program, as if the show's title didn't already give it away.

21. Is the death touch for real? Yes. Probably. Maybe. Could be. Who knows. There's actually a moment in this segment that made me smile.

20. What kind of girls are the best in bed? Uh huh. The show frames each question in big white letters on a gray background in the manner of old-time newsreels. I'm not sure if the filmmakers meant this to be intentionally funny or not.

19. How many floors can you fall in an elevator and still survive? Did you know that about thirty times more people die every year in elevator accidents than die by grizzly bear attacks? Did you care?

---

--> Read More ...