Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Departed Redux, The: Part II


"When I was your age, they would say we could become cops or criminals. What I'm saying to you is this: When you're holding an Oscar in your hand, what's the difference?" --Marty Scoresthebigone

For those of you who may have forgotten how director Martin Scoresanotherone ended his first Oscar-winning, 2006 crime caper, let me reset the stage. The Boston mob, headed up by big-shot Frank Abbott (Juke Nicholsen), had successfully recruited into their circle not only the police plant (or "gopher" as he was known in the story), Billy Costco (Leonardo DiVincicode), but everybody's favorite girlfriend, Dr. Madolyn Albrite (Vera Farmgirl), police Captain Ollie North (Martin Shine), his pugnacious subordinate Digarow Digby (Mark Wallpaper), and cops Beige (Tony Tonerson) and Snellersby (Alex Baldpate) as well. They joined gangland stooge Callin' O'Sullivan (Mutt Damon) and tough-guy Frenchie Duvall (Ray Rhinestone) in one, big, happy family. The picture of togetherness, as you remember from the final scene.

Well, all of these fair-haired rascals are back for another romp in this rollicking 2007 sequel, "The Deported Reducks, Part II: All in the Family Plot Revisited, The Last Laugh." And like any good sequel, this one begins by telling us what the characters are up to at the moment. We learn that mob boss Frank Abbott has now wormed his way into control of the Caterpillar tractor company and made himself president of the corporation. Billy Costco and Callin' O'Sullivan have taken part-time jobs, Costco as an elevator operator and O'Sullivan as a grocery delivery boy. And Captain Ollie North, in an unexpected fit of euphoria, has taken up skydiving.

But things are not as tranquil as they appear, because unbeknownst to Frank, the three godfathers of New York--Frankie Coppola of the Italian mob, Stevie Speelberg of the Jewish mob, and Georgie Lucasi of the Wookie mob--are readying to move in on Frank's Boston territory. Worse, Frank learns that the godfathers are backed by none other than the Boss of Bosses himself, Rogie Cormani, and, zikes, that he's got a mole! Fortunately, he knows he can have the mole removed by a good dermatologist, but the Italians, the Jews, and the Wookies are another story!

So, the plot follows the adventures of these zany characters as they bulldoze their way across Boston and Manhattan. Along the way, lured by the color of money, Howard Hughes shows up in Frank's casino, but he's taken out in the third round by Jake LaMotta and his mom, Big Bertha. Then Travis Bickle, in one of his last temptations, tries to assassinate the gangs of New York, until he's subdued by a demented Max Cady. And before long the whole city is bringing out the dead. The plot winds down when Frank's mother asks him to clean the sheets, and Frank mistakes her for saying he should clean the streets. Another hour of the movie passes until she tells him, "I mean 'sheets,' I don't mean 'streets,'" but by this time Frank has offed half the town. Oh, well. That's Frank for you: Just a sweet, funny, good fella, a king of comedy.

"When I was your age, they would say we could become cops or criminals. What I'm saying to you is this: When you're holding an Oscar in your hand, what's the difference?" --Marty Scoresthebigone

For those of you who may have forgotten how director Martin Scoresanotherone ended his first Oscar-winning, 2006 crime caper, let me reset the stage. The Boston mob, headed up by big-shot Frank Abbott (Juke Nicholsen), had successfully recruited into their circle not only the police plant (or "gopher" as he was known in the story), Billy Costco (Leonardo DiVincicode), but everybody's favorite girlfriend, Dr. Madolyn Albrite (Vera Farmgirl), police Captain Ollie North (Martin Shine), his pugnacious subordinate Digarow Digby (Mark Wallpaper), and cops Beige (Tony Tonerson) and Snellersby (Alex Baldpate) as well. They joined gangland stooge Callin' O'Sullivan (Mutt Damon) and tough-guy Frenchie Duvall (Ray Rhinestone) in one, big, happy family. The picture of togetherness, as you remember from the final scene.

Well, all of these fair-haired rascals are back for another romp in this rollicking 2007 sequel, "The Deported Reducks, Part II: All in the Family Plot Revisited, The Last Laugh." And like any good sequel, this one begins by telling us what the characters are up to at the moment. We learn that mob boss Frank Abbott has now wormed his way into control of the Caterpillar tractor company and made himself president of the corporation. Billy Costco and Callin' O'Sullivan have taken part-time jobs, Costco as an elevator operator and O'Sullivan as a grocery delivery boy. And Captain Ollie North, in an unexpected fit of euphoria, has taken up skydiving.

But things are not as tranquil as they appear, because unbeknownst to Frank, the three godfathers of New York--Frankie Coppola of the Italian mob, Stevie Speelberg of the Jewish mob, and Georgie Lucasi of the Wookie mob--are readying to move in on Frank's Boston territory. Worse, Frank learns that the godfathers are backed by none other than the Boss of Bosses himself, Rogie Cormani, and, zikes, that he's got a mole! Fortunately, he knows he can have the mole removed by a good dermatologist, but the Italians, the Jews, and the Wookies are another story!

So, the plot follows the adventures of these zany characters as they bulldoze their way across Boston and Manhattan. Along the way, lured by the color of money, Howard Hughes shows up in Frank's casino, but he's taken out in the third round by Jake LaMotta and his mom, Big Bertha. Then Travis Bickle, in one of his last temptations, tries to assassinate the gangs of New York, until he's subdued by a demented Max Cady. And before long the whole city is bringing out the dead. The plot winds down when Frank's mother asks him to clean the sheets, and Frank mistakes her for saying he should clean the streets. Another hour of the movie passes until she tells him, "I mean 'sheets,' I don't mean 'streets,'" but by this time Frank has offed half the town. Oh, well. That's Frank for you: Just a sweet, funny, good fella, a king of comedy.

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